Rowville Eagles 0 – 5 MPFC

 

After last week’s victory, the Parkers were still on maximum points and had yet to concede any goals.  This still did not, however, mean that we were top of the ladder, as Rowville had managed to score no less than 10 goals in their first 2 games. Rowville also still with maximum points were, therefore, located in the no 1 spot. Strati had already at some stage in January mentioned that one of the teams to beat was Rowville, as last year they had missed the top ranking spot by what can only be described as a width of a hair. Furthermore the coach hyped the importance of the game, more than a flood warning in Japan, which had left all players more fired up then Dave ‘Helen’ Cahill at a Dan Murphy’s bourbon sale.

It was a sensational day; the weather was in the mid-twenties, sunshine and not a gust of wind in sight. All players arrived on time, as instructed by Strati, and were met with the positive news that the reserves were up against Rowville. After inspecting the pitch, the Parkers could conclude that either there must have been a circus in town, which had for some reason used the main pitch as the arena, or perhaps an equestrian event had occurred while no one was looking. Regardless of what might have been the case, the pitch had seen better days. However, the Parkers had, over the past few years, themselves, been the victim of a little event called the Formula 1 Grand Prix. Therefore, enduring a pitch well below standards was not going to be an issue.

Strati had not been impressed with the attitude during the warm up at last week’s games against Noble Park and had therefore resorted to further expanding the already highly sought after training staff. This meant that Jonny “the Sergeant” Alston would be taking the warm up for the rest of season. For those how don’t know Jonny, he is an extremely enthusiastic individual and had up until last year been a solid part of the senior team’s defensive line. Furthermore, last year he single-handed ensured that at least 50% of the first team had a significant reduction of belly fat with the introduction of “the plank”.

After the intense warm up with more than one side step excises, the game kicked off.  The intensity was through the roof from the first second and everyone seemed to realize that this could be one of these games which could make or break the season. About 20 minutes into the game, after yet another belting attack from the Parkers, Rowville cleared the ball out their left hand side and crossed it in to the defensive wall consisting of Luke Osland, Ally Cook, Nani Bokfast and Wayne Helena. Here Ally tackled the ball back in to the midfield where Kevin Hogan picked up the ball and spotted an almost synchronised attack from George and Stevo down the right flank. Kevin, considering passing with the outside of his foot, which would have landed the ball clean in front of Stevo, but changing his mind in the last second after hearing Strati’s voice in his head, resulted in a ball right in front of George’s feet which was planted without hesitation in the back of the net. (17 min)Parkers in the lead!

Shortly after, the attack paid off once again, when Rowville was forced to clear the ball from the defence and it landed about 30M out. Here Matt D was waiting, with what can only be considered the most lethal right leg in the southern hemisphere he did not disappoint and BANG…(22min) Parkers 2… Rowville 0…

One would have thought that Mr. Matt would have been in a sensational mood after this.. but as Matt has been known to know a bit more then the majority of referees in the league, he endeavoured to explain the rules of football to the man in black which resulted in the referee presenting him with “the cheese sandwich” (Scandinavian Expression relating to a yellow card, also the red card is referred to “the beetroot”..).. Strati was less then pleased…

Second half kickoff in the same fashion as the first half and as Nathan (the London geezer on the left hand side of the midfield… or as he would refer to it “the East Side”) got more and more in to the game, the inevitable happened. Nathan and last season’s player of the year Mick Furness, where creating pure magic on the left side of the park, and after what can only be described as a LEAGUE  A move on the absolute edge on the back line, Nathan crossed the ball in to a completely unmarked George who headed the ball in the back of the net.. (62min)

Only six minutes would pass before George once again would find himself in a critical position in the box.  Stevo  (I believe) who all day had proven to be a pain in the back side for Rowville with his samba moves, crossed another pearl from the right side, which George without fear stormed towards, battling 2 defenders in mid air… The ball proved to be just 2 cm higher the any of the defenders or George himself had calculated, which meant that Kevin, who had been trained by the PET (politiets efteratnings tjeneste.. KGB of Denmark) to anticipate these kinds of situations, now standing behind George got a free shot at the goal, which he did not fail to cash in… (68min)

George who had one hell of a day must have been in such a good mood that he almost laughed at everything.. This was also the case when the referee made a quite doubtful ruling and George properly still high from the nose bleed he got while fighting the 2 giants in the centre of the box… (Previous goal.. All parkers where celebrating.. while George was on the floor…) He laughed out loud, which resulted in the second cheese sandwich of the game… This must however have sparked George’s lust for life and send him sprinting down the left side where he completed his hat-trick for the game… (73 min)

All up an extremely great effort by all players and resulting in the top spot on the ladder being  finally Middle Park.

 

Score: Rowville 0 – Middle Park 5

 

Cards: Matt D and George

 

Substitute: Mark Roberts 73 min.

 

Team: Brian” Mr. Clean Sheet”, Luke “el presidente”, Ally “fire …..”, Narni “Mr. Buckfast”, Wayne ”Mr. Club Man 2010”, Stevo “Mr. Victory dance”, Matt ”el Capitano”, Micky “Mr. Player of the year”, Kevin “Mr. Self control”, Nathan “Mr. London”, George ”Mr. Hat-trick”

 

Bench: Mark “Mr. Tully” and Trevor  ”Mr.. (still to be confirmed)